What If Discomfort Is the Path to What You Really Want?

Can we all agree that we prefer to feel pleasurable emotions? That we like to feel comfortable? Good. Now that we all agree, I want to invite you to consider that the most useful emotions we experience are the ones that are completely outside of our comfort zone. The ones that will get us what we really want are the emotions that don’t really feel that great …sometimes even downright crappy. 

Courage, for example, is a very useful emotion. But from my experience, it feels anything but good in the moment. It feels a lot like anxiety for me. My heart starts to pound hard. I feel sick to my stomach, my face gets flushed and my shoulders tense up. It’s not pleasant at all. That’s because courage can’t happen without the presence of fear. Fear is necessary in order to experience courage. Courage helps us to take action even in the face of fear…which is always useful. 

The same goes for determination and commitment. Both are extremely useful at driving us into action, but they also feel really hard. They require us to dig deep and do things we don’t really feel like doing. Not very enjoyable, right? But without determination or commitment, you might not get to the other side of whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish in your life. 

The reason we often don’t get to where we want to be in our life is because of our unwillingness to feel the emotions that will get us there.  So, when you’re thinking about the things you want in your life, ask yourself, “Am I willing to feel uncomfortable (but useful) emotions in order to get there?” 

So, why even bother with all the discomfort anyway? Because the more you do the uncomfortable…the more you face fear with courage, stick to what you say you’ll do, or stay committed to something…the more confidence you will create. 

And what would be possible for you if you had more confidence?


Stacy R. Landry

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